BDSM Dating Sites Reviewed (Updated for 2020)

Before you can find the right person through online dating, you need to be using the right methods.

There are lots of sites, but some people need ones that are tailored to their lifestyle. If you're seeking BDSM dating sites, a run-of-the-mill dating site won't do.

The good news is that you don't have to settle for less. There are quite a few great sites out there for the BDSM community.

Whether you've been a part of this scene for years or are finally giving it a real shot after much curiosity, we're here to give our experience with these sites. Let's dive in.

Our Rating

Benefits

Today's Deal

  • Privacy
  • Free Messaging for Women
  • Quick to Sign up
  • Allows Nudity
  • Large User Base
  • Chatroom Feature
  • Free Messaging for Women
  • Easy Signup
  • Chatroom
  • Great for Kinky Individuals
  • Chatroom
  • Detailed Profiles
  • Quick Signup Process

Read Full Review

1. Ashley Madison

Ashley Madison might sound like the name of a sweet girl next door, but the site that bears her name isn't quite so soft-hearted.

This site has quite a reputation, which isn't hard to understand when you know what it's about. Originally the point of using Ashley Madison was to find another lover, but it isn't limited to that.

While this site isn't necessarily a BDSM-style affair, but with over 30 million members here, there are many members into the lifestyle. And others who you can introduce to it.

Marriages can find themselves in ruts for lots of reasons. Ashley Madison doesn't force people to cheat. It simply gives them an outlet to act on their desires. 

Gender Ratio Breakdown


Recommended Age

25+

Number of Members

30 Million

Sign Up
Time

20 Minutes

For People Seeking

BDSM & Bondage

PROS

  • Privacy
  • Free Messaging for Women
  • Quick Sign Up

CONS

  • Available Singles Vary By Location
  • Profiles Can Be Un-Informative

2. Adult Friend Finder

While you've likely heard of Adult Friend Finder, you might not know just how much the site can deliver for people who are interested in casual dating. 

This might not be a BDSM dating site explicitly, but trust us when we tell you it shouldn't be much trouble finding users who are into that sort of thing.

When using Adult Friend Finder, try to express your BDSM fondness as openly as you can. 

There are people like you, looking for people like you. You can make desires really come true for you and others.

Gender Ratio Breakdown


Recommended Age

25+

Number of Members

80 Million

Sign Up
Time

20 Minutes

For Singles Seeking

BDSM & Bondage

PROS

  • Allows Nudity
  • Fast Sign Up
  • Chatroom Feature

CONS

  • More Men Than Women
  • Some Fake Profiles

3. BeNaughty

Created more than a decade ago, BeNaughty has been an excellent site for those who want to keep things casual.

The devilish logo speaks for itself. When you're on BeNaughty, you can be as sinfully playful as possible.

BeNaughty does a very good job of keeping out fake accounts and appealing to men and women. In fact, 60 percent of the users are female.

This could definitely be credited to how women get to send messages for free.

This site isn't for BDSM only, but the sort of users it attracts goes hand-in-hand with that kind of thing.

Not too much is asked of you upon joining BeNaughty. You just need to prove you're real and follow their photo guidelines. 

Gender Ratio Breakdown


Recommended Age

25+

Number of Members

4 Million

Sign Up
Time

15 Minutes

For Singles Seeking

Kink & Fetish

PROS

  • Free Messaging For Women
  • Casual Relations & Hookups
  • Affordable Membership

CONS

  • Profiles Not Very Detailed
  • More Women Than Men

4. Alt.com

Looking for solidarity and fun with people who really get you? Join Alt.com.

This has been one of the best communities for kinky relationships since its founding.

On this site, you can really see how many possibilities there are in the BDSM world.

Alt.com is full of users who love BDSM, in their early-20s, late-50s, and everything in-between.

 The BDSM community is a lot more inviting than people might give it credit for. Visit this site for a crash course or jump right in if you're experienced!

Gender Ratio Breakdown


Recommended Age

25+

Number of Members

300,000

Sign Up
Time

15 Minutes

For Singles Seeking

BDSM & Bondage

PROS

  • Great for Kinky Individuals
  • Detailed Profiles
  • Chatroom

CONS

  • More Men Than Women
  • Less Users

5. Bondage Pal

May it seems like we're straining, etymologically-speaking, but you can't spell "bondage" without "bond."

You can join Bondage Pal in a pretty short amount of time to start developing bonds with other users. This can be as few as five minutes.

Bondage Pal is for BDSM daters who don't want any runaround from their dating sites. The more care you put into your profile, the better.

UPDATE: Recent feedback from readers have shown us that 9 out of every 10 profiles are fake. This is the reason we've given this site a 2 out of 5 stars and can't recommend this site in full faith any longer.

Gender Ratio Breakdown


Recommended Age

25+

Number of Members

500,000

Sign Up
Time

20 Minutes

For Singles Seeking

Kink & Fetish

PROS

  • Quick Sign Up Process

CONS

  • 90%  Fake Accounts
  • Users Are Hardly Active

Editors Conclusion


You likely never knew there were so many choices for BDSM websites. There is something for everyone it's just a matter of you're most interested in. 

From our research, we've determined the best ones are
Ashley Madison and Alt.com.

We recommend Ashley Madison for those who are looking for a massive user base full of open minded, kinky members.  

Alt.com for those who are looking for a "BDSM only community". Try one or both of these, as both have free trials.

Breakup Shop Team

The Breakup Shop team is a group of dating and relationship experts who share their in-depth knowledge with our community of 20,000 people strong! We are people just like you, with a desire to share our personal experiences and advice regarding breakups, heartbreak, dating, and relationships. Welcome to the community!